Teens will exhibit behaviors of defiance, anger and disrespect. An occasional missing curfew, a door slam or rolling of the eyes is not an indicator that things will get worse. Often the escalation of defiance leads to Authority Problems outside the home and in school and with the law and law enforcement.
Teens are moving toward becoming independent young adults, often without a road map. They may start by breaking rules of the home: coming in past curfew, staying up past an established bedtime; staying out all night; not doing their chores, smoking and drinking. Then they refuse to do what you ask and have no problem telling you ‘they don’t have to listen to you.’ You set limits. You have your teen’s best interest at heart. You want them to succeed. You fear for the consequences of their choices.
Angry teens are quite a challenge for parents and siblings in the home. If your teen has not expressed anger inappropriately in the past and then begins to slam doors, yell or scream at you or others in the home or become destructive, you need to address the behavior. You cannot let it continue. The expression of anger can be violent, lashing out physically at young siblings and sometimes parents. Teen with anger problems often throw or break things. The anger can erupt at any moment and seemingly without cause. This sets the family on edge and wary of every action for fear of an angry response from the teen. The teen needs help in expressing anger and frustration appropriately.
An occasional rolling of the eyes or muttering how unfair the rules are is normal.
Disrespect is often taken personally. You feel insulted and offended. An occasional rolling of the eyes or muttering how unfair the rules are is normal. As a parent you need to understand this behavior is just an expression of frustration. Rebellion is part of becoming independent. It is not personal. On the other hand, disrespect is deliberate, hurtful, demeaning and rude. This type of behavior should not be tolerated. Remember, you are not alone. The parents of every other teen are experiencing the same thing.
When the behavior of a defiant, angry and or disrespectful teen results in parents and those close to them waiting for the next emotional outburst or a feeling intense anxiety whenever the teen is around; a problem exists. Parents become exhausted, feeling as though they’ve “tried everything” to get through to their teen and nothing is working. Such troubled teens are often left to their own device, to succeed or fail. This creates a cycle of frustration, anxiety, and conflict that is doomed to intensify to the point of someone – the teen, the parent, or both – reaching a breaking point.
Outside intervention is needed. Integrity House, a residential treatment center, deals with this type of behavior daily. Our staff consistently applies the rules and work with your teen daughter to look at her behavior, acknowledge it, see how it affects her and the people around her and examine how she could respond to the same or similar situation in a more appropriate manner in the future.
Call us today. Our Admissions Staff will be happy to discuss your situation.
